[Paint-Bit Theater] Deus Ex Human Revolution Ep. 01 – Adam Jensen’s Precious Little Life

We start, in traditional Deus Ex fashion, with the BBEGs talking about their plans. We see one guy in a suit talking via holo-skype to several others. I always knew that skype was a tool of the Illuminati, so it’s good of Edios to confirm that.

We cut to a news program where a ludicrously* attired presenter named Eliza Cassan. she’s talking about demonstrations protesting human augmentation, when we pull back and find ourselves in the office of Dr. Megan Reed. Our protagonist, Adam Jensen, is arguing with some military type over the phone about security for an impending senate hearing.

After gaining control of Jensen, I picked up an eBook laying on the couch with some stuff about a “patient x” in it. Apparently “patient x” has some sort of genetic quirk that means he doesn’t have to worry about implant rejection syndrome, which is apparently a Big Deal. Apparently this means that soon everyone can have augments, which is pretty cool.

After messing around and reading her e-mail (Jensen’s kind of a jerk), I talk to Megan has we start a short section where  you’re walked through a few labs. You met some scientists, as well as talk to Megan about all the military contracts your company is getting. Megan defends their work by saying that they help lots of average people, but this is almost immediately undermined by a demonstration of one of these military projects, the Typhoon system. The best way to describe this things is as a reuse-able suicide vest, but without the suicide part.

I predict that this foreshadowing will have no further impact on the plot of the game.

After the demo, Adam and Megan get into an elevator on the way to see their boss, David Sarif. There is some light banter showing that the two had a Thing, but they are interrupted by Frank Pritchard, company tech specialist and general jerkface. Megan gets off to check on something, leaving Pritchard and Jensen to snark at each other.

After arriving that the penthouse, Pritchard goes to explain how the scientists GPL** implants work, while Jensen goes in to see David.

Allow me to get something out of the way before we continue.

David Sarif is, as we in the know say, a GQ Motherfuckerâ„¢. The only thing with better looking polygons than his hair is his waistcoat. His cybernetic arm has gold inlay and is worth more than your car. He’s probably best friends with The Dos Equis Guy and goes drinking with The Man Your Man Could Smell Like.

Now that we have all that out of the way…

Jensen goes to confirm that all the security details are in place when a alarm goes off. There’s been an accident in one of the labs, and Sarif sends you down to help. In the elevator Pritchard calls you to tell you all the cameras are being jammed and that Megan’s GPL signal indicated she was running. On hearing that, Jensen pulls a combat rifle out of Hammerspace and you are given control as the elevators open to show that the labs are on fire. As you move through the complex tutorials are given, and you discover that this isn’t an accident, but that you’re being attacked by augmented mercenaries.

After some more tutorials and some combat, we cut to a FMV where you get ambushed and thrown through a wall by the leader of the mercs, A man we (much, much) later learn is named Namir. Namir pretty much wrecks Jensen, leaving him bleeding out on the floor before putting a revolver to his head. We hear a gunshot, and then see a credit sequence that splices scenes of Jensen getting saved via augmentation surgery with dialogue from Sarif and flashes of Megan saying that she loves you.

Next week, we’ll infiltrate our own factory, defuse a bomb and have a chat with a charming racial stereotype.